Our nursing relationship
Even before she was conceived I was thinking of her as our “do-over” child; this time I would do things right. Which, of course, is subjective and there are so many circumstances factoring in to the mother-child relationship you can’t ever be in control of it. And that’s what I mean by doing things right! Learning from the way things had gone with my first two children I had an idea of the things I wanted to give up control of. I saw where stress was created needlessly by my own expectations (especially about sleep schedules and breastfeeding schedules). I wanted to appreciate the river-like qualities of mothering and go along with the natural course.
My youngest and I have such a good relationship. She and I share control over nursing. Sometimes I ask her to be careful because I don’t feel good. Sometimes she asks me to nurse more often because she doesn’t feel good. I started working outside the home when she was 16 months old and I figured she would wean within a month or so. But she is now 41 months old and still nursing 2 or 3 times a day.
“River’s wisdom says to follow the path of least resistance. She flows over rocks and around mountains. She takes the shape of each new landscape she enters. But over time she also shapes the land. As your child changes, you too must adopt new forms of mothering. If you hold tight to familiar landmarks of childhood, you cannot offer your children the freedom they need. Attune yourself to the flow of what is. Hold on to what is most important and liberate everything else.” ~The Mother’s Wisdom Deck by Niki Dewart and Elizabeth Marglin with illustrations by Jenny Kostecki-Shaw.
The photos were taken in October by Cheyenne Kody Photography.