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Recent Search Engine Terms

February 14, 2008

. . .

These are some recent search engine terms that were strange enough to capture my attention. I’ve linked them to the posts of mine that I think could have come up as results of the searches.

ron paul removable tattooThis is too funny! I like the adjective “removable.” It seems ironic. You tattoo something that you love and something that you will never lose your passion for into your skin with permanent ink, but if you’re worried about what people will think or how you will feel in the future, you’d better make the image “removable.” Bah! My brother-in-law just got a huge tattoo of Che Guevara on his upper arm. If someone is going to go overboard with revolutionary hero cult-worship, I would much rather see a permanent Ron Paul tattoo than a permanent Che Guevara tattoo.

my child’s tooth was knocked looseVariations of this phrase have been very popular over the past two weeks. Some others are: “dentist’s advice to loose tooth,” “loose front teeth in the morning,” and “pediatric dental loose teeth from fall.” Please, parents, call your child’s dentist when there has been an injury. Don’t go around looking for answers on blogs.

i got tagged by weird thingsI don’t know what it is about this phrase that entertains me so much.

what to wear to a police concertSorry, I can only offer my (and my readers’) suggestions for what to wear to an Ani DiFranco concert.

fucking in a windmill photographsNope. None of those here. I’ve used all of those words on my blog at one time or another, but never in that particular order. I do take requests for photo series, but I think I’ll pass on that one.

can genetics explain who we areWe report. You decide.

i feel like my face looks weird in publicWas that you JohnnyPeepers?

. . .

  1. February 14, 2008 11:53 am

    I’ve had a couple of wierd ones recently. I’ve thought about adding a page solely for those oddball search terms.

  2. February 14, 2008 11:53 am

    PS: I had someone search something in arabic! πŸ˜€

  3. February 14, 2008 1:30 pm

    Wasn’t me FW, and I am insulted that I would be the one accused πŸ™‚

    I have more than a few “interesting” search terms. Like Accountable, I plan on putting up a post on them. I liked the idea of analyzing the motive of the searcher.

    Here are some of my favorites:

    poetry molested
    cost A gram of tina meth crystal
    propelling a turd
    asexual butterfly
    will you shave my coin purse
    “how to properly jerk off”
    compressed air to empty pig skulls
    stories on forced tit milking of slaves
    breath play noose
    purple headed warrior
    manuel noriega’s 50 lbs bag
    joel osteen douchebag (I get plenty of variations of this one mostly focusing on the search term anti-Christ)

    Are any one of the above your work of authorship?

  4. February 14, 2008 2:35 pm

    Yes, I am the author of every single one of those. How did you know? πŸ˜‰

  5. rosiemolinary permalink
    February 15, 2008 8:05 am

    FW, This post is inspired and hysterical. I might have to plagarize the idea because I am always cracking up (and wondering ‘what is going on with that person’) when I see the search engine terms that brought someone to my site. Thanks for the morning laugh!

  6. February 15, 2008 9:35 am

    Thanks Rosie! I’d like to see some of your blog’s search engine terms and your analysis of the searchers’ motivations. It is always fun for me to wonder “what is going on with that person” and share the best ones with you all.

  7. February 15, 2008 10:55 am

    I read somewhere on some blog, a poem that the blogger created out of the weird and funny search words. It was great!

    Question – Regarding these search phrases and the counts…. [if anyone knows?] Does this mean that someone actually visited my blog after searching on the term/phrase? or was my blog presented in the search results and not necessarily chosen by the searcher as a go-to click? Just curious…. Thanks, “C”

    “Does my face look weird in private or only in public?” What a crazy thing to ponder!?

  8. February 15, 2008 11:21 am

    Oh hee hee, Curious C. That poem was written by me (and I’m sure there are others that have done the same thing).

    Yes, to answer your question. If the phrase shows up in your blog stats it means someone actually clicked on your blog and visited to see what was up.

  9. February 15, 2008 12:30 pm

    I love the windmill photographs one. That was great! No one does searches for my blog 😦

  10. February 15, 2008 12:46 pm

    Chris, is that a challenge? πŸ˜› I’ll see if I can end up on your blog through a search.

  11. February 15, 2008 11:12 pm

    WOW! The last four are amazing! Whew! The photo one is craaazy!

  12. February 15, 2008 11:42 pm

    ROFL The search terms are too funny. I am with Mercedes..Craaazy! πŸ™‚ !

  13. Hawk permalink
    February 16, 2008 9:41 am

    This is just too damn funny. Thanks for the laughter and smiles this Saturday morning. My regrets for not being around more frequent. Frankly, I have been too many places on the net in general.

    Your post gives me an idea for one of my own since the well has been dry lately.


  14. February 16, 2008 1:21 pm

    Mercedes, do you get any requests for photos in lighthouses? LOL!

    Angie, yes, they are just a few examples of the craziness that is in my blog stats. πŸ™‚

    Hawk, thanks for coming by. I’m glad that they made you laugh. I’d love to see this on your blog sometime. πŸ˜‰

  15. February 17, 2008 6:56 pm

    Check your search term box, you might see a cool one πŸ™‚

  16. February 17, 2008 7:34 pm

    LOL! “Does fightingwindmills read too much into . . . ” It gets cut off, but I understand the gist of it.

    I got a lot of good ones today.

    stupid fucking crazy
    simple back tattoos
    front tooth knocked back
    daughter bed
    my son doesn’t understand my feelings
    achievement gap, chinese
    breast wean “cold turkey”
    the times, february 4th, windmills discussion
    dragon tattoos- lower back
    virginia republican voters registered

    I could go on and on . . .

  17. February 17, 2008 8:08 pm

    Hehe, I found you with “does fightingwindmills read too much into search terms?”

  18. February 17, 2008 8:11 pm

    Those are hilarious! My favs are “i got tagged by weird things” and “i feel like my face looks weird in public” roflmao

  19. February 18, 2008 6:11 am

    Recently, I haven’t been getting many of the wacky ones. I really liked “I got tagged by weird things”.

  20. February 18, 2008 10:18 am

    That was funny Johnny. Thanks for making me laugh.

    CG, I’m glad you liked them. I sometimes wonder if anyone shares my sense of humor. It seems that many do!

    Bikkuri, what are some of your wacky ones from the past?

  21. February 18, 2008 12:08 pm

    OK, I dug some up from an old post about this topic.

    1. Candy Girl Costume Entertain (this comes up often)
    2. Come Across the Tremendous Strength
    3. Those who don’t study history are doomed
    4. “almost as if”
    5. Quelle Demage (sic)
    6. Starting Car Cold Temperature Loud Hiss

    I think I’m actually the number one hit on Google for number 5, although it is misspelled. Number 1 amuses me because I’m sure they aren’t finding what they want on my site. Number 2 always reminds me of “That Hideous Strength”, the third book in C.S.Lewis’ “Out of the Silent Planet” trilogy. I used to be a high hit for number 4, but have slid to oblivion there.

    One that struck me recently was: tokonoma tokonoma. As far as I know there is no benefit to entering a search parameter twice. What were they thinking?

    On a positive note, I got this one this week:

    Share my joy with you

    How nice is that?

  22. February 20, 2008 10:15 am

    I love when you post these FW! I just got found through a search of: “I’m easy smileys” ha

  23. February 20, 2008 11:49 am

    “stupid fucking crazy”

    That one busted me up real good. I think they were looking for me and got your blog instead. That is hilarious.

    I got some more too:

    antichrist calculator
    naomi campbell nude
    what does shellfish form when it goes ba (I wonder what the rest said)
    is a noose free speech or hate speech? (the answer is – both)
    moral responses to the anarchist cookbook

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